Imposter Syndrome

A warm welcome to all new subscribers.

I’m excited to say that almost three thousand of you have now joined this community of independent musicians. I have messages from all over the world in my inbox. I’m responding to as many as I can.

I can’t pretend to have all the answers. Some questions are out of my comfort zone – but we can learn together. 

This week’s topic. Imposter Syndrome.

It’s one of the biggest challenges you’ll face.

Because what do you have to say about anything? 

You know everyone who was mean to you at school? Well, every week, they all get together, make dinner and then listen to your latest song (or video) and laugh about it. 

Laugh about you.

Your parents wonder where they went wrong raising you.

Even your close friends think it’s just one of your phases and you’ll get bored of it soon, just like you did with Ju-Jitsu, rock climbing and that week you said you were writing a screenplay.

I jest. But you will have to do a certain amount of soul searching on this journey and see if you have the self-confidence to present yourself to the world. I’ve been called a lot of things in the comments section. It’s no coincidence that I took up boxing around the same time my YouTube really started to get traction.

But do you know what? At least you’re doing something. The world is full of unfinished novels, screenplays, paintings, knitting…

Creative pursuits are hard. They take a long time to master. And they can make you feel vulnerable. You’re putting yourself out there. Most people don’t take that risk.

If a few people make snide comments – so what? You don’t need that negativity in your life. And the more realistic scenario? No one watches or listens at all, at least for a while. Most people are too wrapped up in themselves to notice what you’re up to.

Trust in yourself that if you find your creative content genuinely interesting, then you will eventually find others like you.

I think I was really lucky that I’d always been underestimated. I failed a lot, played terrible gigs and made a lot of mistakes. Plenty of things had happened to knock me before I started my YouTube channel, and I was twenty-seven by the time it started to take off and really grow.

I felt confident enough in my ability at the time to think ‘no one else is doing this, so I’ll do it’ – and talk about it from a perspective of, ‘I don’t know everything. I’ve not owned a guitar shop for fifty years or released a hit record. You’re on this journey with me.’

The whole thought of ‘how dare you speak about this when you know nothing’ is such an archaic view, because we should all have the freedom to learn and discover things. No one’s lived what you’ve lived, or done what you’ve done.

If you want to perform, and get your work out there, you will have to put yourself in positions where you feel uncomfortable. 

It doesn’t matter that you’re not an expert, because once you become an expert then you’re practically a dinosaur, and if you profess to know everything you have no relatability to anyone.

But if you can discover things and take people along with you, that’s far more interesting.

I still have a beginner's mindset. I have huge gaps in my knowledge. But I’m working on filling them, and learning something new, day-by-day. 

I want you to write down ten of the worst things you could ever read about yourself. You can’t play, you have bad teeth, you have an awful voice, an unattractive personality. Be inventive. Have fun with it. I think you’ll find these words have far less power written down than they do in your head. You know the saying – sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

Mary x

(Independent Artist of the week: If you’re a fan of Paramore or Evanescence, UK rockers Vamoosery have just released their debut album, Moving Forward – why not help them out by giving it a listen wherever you stream your music. Thanks to Kevin (drums) for writing in – be sure to check out his solo project, K.A.B. too.

To respond to this newsletter, just reply or email [email protected].

If you were forwarded this email from a friend, and would like to subscribe, please go here.)